A Moose on the Loose
by Sunny's Priceless Dream
Summary: Four men, one hunting trip, and a single moose. All men enjoy hunting, right?


**A/N- So when most of the reviews to this say "Sunny, this was so random, I can't even leave a review", I'll understand. The moose song is a real song, I can't take credit for it though...as great as it is, I didn't write it. **

"I'm sorry, come again?"

"We have next week off. We're going hunting."

"No, no I'm not. I'm relaxing at home next week."

"Cody, you are going hunting. I don't want to hear anything else about it."

"No Chris, I am going home, and not leaving my bed." Cody corrects him. Hunting? No damn way.

"But we need you there Cody." Chris tells him.

"We?" Cody asks, who else was Chris dragging into this unwillingly?

"Theodore and Lance Cade."

"It's not even hunting season Chris, we can't hunt deer." Cody reminds him. It was only October, hunting season didn't begin for more then a month.

"Who said anything about deer hunting?"

"It's not duck season either. Or turkey."

"I'm not seeing your point assclown." Chris says, putting the last of his clothes into his suitcase.

"It's illegal to hunt right now. Besides, do you even have hunting license?" Cody asks, picking up a pink shirt laying on his bed. He's never seen it before.

"...No. But I'm Y2J, I don't need them."

"What the hell is this?" Cody asks, holding up the shirt, momentarily forgetting about the bogus hunting trip.

"A shirt." Chris cracks, doing his best not to laugh at Cody's look of disgust at the shirt. "Can't even think straight!" was printed on the front of the shirt.

"Not funny Chris." Cody says, throwing the shirt at him.

"Hey assclown, I didn't do it. Theodore did. I've been too busy planning this hunting trip."

"Well you guys have fun. I'm still not going." Cody insists, the shirt now off his mind.

"Wrong again Junior." Before Cody could say anything, a knock sounded through the room. Cody walked to the door and opened it, revealing a confused looking Ted.

"CHRIS! Do I take the camouflage, or the orange hunting suit?" Ted asks, bypassing Cody and showing both articles of clothing to Chris.

"Well...you look good in orange, but the camouflage brings out your eyes." Chris tells him.

"I guess you're right."

"But just to be safe, take both." Chris advises. Cody rolls his eye and slams the door shut. Why is Ted so excited? And why does he hang on every word Jericho says? Cody would never know.

"Good idea. I'll see you in the morning. Three AM sharp."

"Why the hell are we getting up at three AM?" Cody asks, speaking up for the first time since Ted entered.

"That's when the flight leaves for Maine" Ted tells him.

"And why the hell are we going to Maine?" Cody asks, having no idea what is going on.

"That's where all the good moose are!"

"..."

"..."

"I'm not going." Cody says after a moment of silence?

Moose?

**XXX**

_**Two days later**_

It's been two days. Two days of walking through miles of open land. Two days of carrying a gun on his shoulder, wearing boots that weighed more then he did, and dealing with the crisp cold, October air. It's not even winter and it's already forty degrees in Maine. Cody wasn't enjoying this at all. It might be a little more bearable if he didn't have to constantly listen to Jericho, Lance, and the ever joyous Ted singing.

**_There was a great big moose  
Who liked to drink a lot of juice  
There was a great big moose  
Who liked to drink a lot of juice _**

**_  
Singing whoa-oh-oh-oh  
Way-oh way-oh way-oh way-oh  
Way-oh, way-oh!  
Way-oh way-oh way-oh way-oh _**

**_The moose's name was Fred  
He liked to drink his juice in bed  
The moose's name was Fred  
He liked to drink his juice in bed _**

**_He drank his juice with care  
But he spilt it in his hair  
He drank his juice with care  
But he spilt it in his hair _**

**_Now there's a sticky moose  
Full of juice...  
On the loose_**

The first few times it wasn't so bad, but after the sixth hour, non stop, Cody was annoyed.

"Hey assclown, you missed your verse!" Chris exclaimed. He stopped walking and turned around to face Cody. Ted shot him looks of disgust.

"I told you I am not singing. It's cold, I'm miserable, and I want to go home."

"Cody Rhodes. We are men. Men hunt. So suck it up and shoot a moose."

"Shut up Lance. How did you even get the owner of this land to let us 'hunt' here?"

"I have connections."

"Well does the owner know that Chris isn't authorized to carry a gun?" Cody asks.

"Doesn't matter." Cade tells him.

"Well I'm sure it would if he saw Chris and Ted crawling on their knees, in what I'm sure they would describe as tracking a moose that is thirty feet away." Cody said, pointing to Chris and Ted. Doing a double take, both Cody and Lance realize what is going on.

There's a moose.

Thirty feet away.

Neither Chris or Ted can load, let alone shoot a gun.

This isn't going to end well.

They heard the gun go off. Followed by a deafening scream. Cody nor Lance Cade could see Ted or Chris. Giving each other a quick glance, they took off running towards their two friends, afraid of what they would see when they got there.

"TED? CHRIS?" Cody yelled, the closer to them he got, the more frightened he became. Chris was laying on his stomach, head down, with Ted sitting beside him, looking on in disbelief.

"What happened? Where is he shot? It's okay, he's going to be fine." Cody started rambling, quickly dropping to his knees beside Jericho, who was what sounded like, weeping. This was bad. Vince was going to kill him. Chris was champion. How was Cody going to explain this. He looked at Ted, who was still looking ahead in disbelief. Lance just stayed silent.

"The genius missed the moose." Ted said, bursting out laughing.

"It..was...like...five...feet...in..front...of us..." Ted said in between breaths.

"HE JUMPED TO AVOID THE BULLET!" Chris screamed at Ted, finally sitting up. The damn moose jumped, Chris saw it. He had the moose right where he wanted him, and it jumped. It didn't register to him at first that Cody was yelling a few seconds ago.

"Why the hell were you yelling like an assclown, Junior?" Chris asks, choking back his tears from missing the moose.

"Nothing. I'm going home." Cody said. He just about had a heart attack, thinking one of his friends was shot and hurt, and no one seemed to care. He started to walk away when Chris yelled out.

"NOT UNTIL WE TRACK DOWN THE MOOSE I SHOT."

"I THOUGHT IT JUMPED?" Cody yelled back, but not turning around.

"I THINK I GRAZED IT!"


End file.
